Criticism. Essay. Fiction. Science. Weather.
1A piece removed. 2Come eat it.
Or don't. 3Wine, Shoulder, Bolt, Socket. 4Mothbombs 5On the road with your only soul. 6One woman's trash is another woman's treasure 7Aliens! Right here in America! 8It's not as crazy as it sounds
or, music is as music does 91) Sign.
2) Hope for the best. 10A friendship in a bottle. 11A five-year-old tries his hand at action adventure. 12Will the circle be unbroken. 1390ways' first Quaterly Review rages on:
2 samples of Fiction. 14Muscles and fat.
A thin layer of sweat. 15Fiction goes serial.
Part 1 has sex and drugs.
You know you want to stay tuned. 16Our fiction serial concludes to cure your
vertigo from last week's cliff-hanger. 17An iced-out 21-speed sensation: The Moves are
all up on your handlebars. 18We're all in this together.
Except those bastards in administration. 19Jilted, laughed at,
and in the air. 20Swirling and swirling... 21You can't make yourself like them, but you have to pretend because they are your family. 22How well do jewel cases retain odor?
About as well as you stink. 23It's black and white. It's old world.
It's photo time. 24Piggy calls, wanting to sell you insurance.
This is what's on the other end of the line. 25A long pause, then, 26Fiction's Second Qaurterly Review
can speak Italian. 27It's only bread, after all. 28It's job search time at 90ways. 29George W. Bush's resting heart rate and a bum in a green sweater. 30Antique weaponry and teenage angst.
Together at last. 31One-hundred-fifty-three syllables
of October fun. 32there is only
self 33She's cold to the touch.
Cold and pebbly. 34Gut-wrenching love.
And wallabies. 35Building a habit out of ivies and orange flowers. 36A 90ways exclusive sneak peak at the
new and groundbreaking Alphabet Book. 37Type it with one hand and
see what happens 38A face any susbsitence farmer could love. 39The Quarterly Review: read it again for the third time. 40For every task, someone is the best.
Sometimes that's impressive. 41I didn't get a computer;
I moved to Indiana. 42A piece removed. 4390ways has new concerns about identity theft. Lock up the children and your sense of self. 44time. eyes. deep sighs. 45I know there's a place 4690 stars are born. 47I had to ask. 48It's about sex.
But isn't that always the way with classical music? 49The epistolary form in the 21st century.
Complete with neuroses and unpunctuation. 50There is no end to the party. 51Rockin to the sweet sounds of prepared food. 52Of or pertaining to. 53Including spaces, this blurb is 90 characters. Ways, words, characters. It is a leitmotif. 54Minnesota. Miami. Poetry in 90ways' Fiction.
It's the best of all worlds. 55It lives and breathes and is hungry for carnival food. 56A piece removed. 57The curtain is being pulled back... 58Up in the Fiction house! It's a bird. It's a plane.
It's an illustralogue! 59The hat, in all honesty, is a private matter. 60Putting up with all the doth. 6190words strike terror into the hearts of the longwinded. 62Return of the illustralogue! 63Take one down, pass it around,
blow your nose. 64A piece removed. 65The First Quarterly Review wants
you to meet its little friend. 66From our servers to your ear buds!
It's misguided enthusiasm, in podcast form! 67Questions for the man himself.
Plus, the podcast adventure continues. 68No one would ever use Starbucks
to define their identity. Right... 69Don't you remember the rose clipped under my windshield wiper like a butterfly under a pin? 70Oh, it's nothing.
Oh, it's life-threatening disease. 71It's not you. It's me.
And my Eurasian captors.
72Root, root, root for the brisk
sale of anything possible. 73Look within the very bowels of the soul.
Or at least your mother. 74We're not strangers any more. 75He knows of what he speaks. 76I find that often times I'm quite
mature enough to enjoy a few beverages. 77He is licking me.
I don't like it one bit. 78Our favorite stuff is coming 'round the mountain, again. 79A wooden-back brush and a homemade bowl of oatmeal. 80A man's home is his... 81Fack to the Buture. 82This dude pulled back on his nose
and mucus and unleashed a city. 83The polls are in. 93% of respondents do not approve of the monkeybone lodged in their lower lip 84Like a thirsty man in the desert 85Taxpayer dollars wasted on broken egg. News at eleven. 86She loves her red octopus.
She will chew it to death. 87Bubbling, gurgling, fighting a moment to stay afloat. 88Molting our pasts into the air... 89The Return of 90 Words 90It comes but once a... ever. 91Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, the end of the Fiscal Quarter. 92The 540 word circle is now unbroken. 93An emptying out of the animus, perceived as tranquility
94All roads lead to South Dakota. Or at least the I-90 does, anyway. 95He laid down his whittling knife and he and his brother took up arms in rage. 96Drinking manhattans made with a good bourbon, and strong. 97Living white and pudgy, I never expected much for myself. Now, I could tell that was true. 98A few gestural lines towards the thought of death. 99Rest in peace.
I know I will. 100And then we played baseball and then we played army and then we were best friends. 101We torn holes in sheets and became ghosts for each other's pleasures. 102I looked at the pictures of you, twenty years old,
sometimes skinny and sometimes your face a soft moon.
103Fingers clutching little trinkets of the day... 104All roads lead to South Dakota. Or at least the I-90 does, anyway. 105Everywhere signs of an interstice arriving. 106What you see and what you believe are two different things. 107It was as if a million literary ghosts poured from its pages, moaning to be set free. 108So what if too many times we have been here, both
lost in our machinations...
The Korowai Think Tank
From: The Project for the New Korowai Century (PNKC)
To: Chief Alotau
Re: The Future of the Korowai People
Honourable and Most-Feared Chief Alou,
The Korowai People of Papua New Guinea have always been proud to maintain century old traditions despite accusations of "primitivism" and "Stone Age Values". In fact, their everyday practice of witchcraft and tree house dwelling first drew criticism from the White Ghost Men upon their arrival two generations past. But recent findings in the Korowai Policy Index reveal a new trend in Korowai thinking, a trend that many Korowai Chieftains hope will make the Korowai people a major power player in the Papua tribal communities.
Though individual leaders may cling to the Korowai traditions like a wild pig to a tree kangaroo, the average Korowai do not approve of the so-called "social norms"; specifically in regards to marriage, housing, justice, external presentation. The following report will examine findings from the 2006 Korowai Policy Index with the hopes of proving not only an overwhelming demand, but a need for more forward, multilateral thinking and practice among the Korowai Tribe.
Tree dwelling, a means of shelter and habitation for centuries, has met with some resistance in the recent years. The Korowai list accessibility to these domiciles as central to their complaint, many noting the potentially dangerous route to and from the front door. "If you wake up in the middle of the night and want a snack, you have to climb down a 15 foot Cinchona tree trunk. Sure, vines help. But if you're already groggy, a craving for a nip of sago milk could cost you your life." Though we appreciate the increased security measures (a gate around the community, lock and key mailboxes), tribe members feel that a more grounded approach to housing is long overdue for the Korowai people.
Many Korowai are concerned with the superficial. Despite being a tradition based in the myth of the God Sepiktonta, a staggering 93% of the Korowai do not approve of the traditional monkeybone lodged in their lower lip. It seems that while commonplace tasks such as eating, lovemaking and talking are obviously hindered, it is actually the inability to whistle that is presented as the most irksome of the monkeybone's prohibitions. "While hunting for tree kangaroo, we would love to trill 'Ta-Ra-Ra Boom De-Ay' to and from the forest, but with the monkeybone... you try it, buddy," stated one Korowai male. On the opposing side, the Korowai female appreciate that they can walk past the construction site of a new maternity hut without having to worry about being catcalled.
Also, Korowai shaman Duon, hopes that the removal of the monkeybone will allow him to have a more non-Korowai clientele. "If I can name one deterrent for outsiders patronizing my medicine hut and buying my cures, I would have to say it's the monkeybone," Duon laments. "Other shamans tell me that outsiders don't have a problem with pervasive nudity or body odor; so you tell me the only other difference!"
Removal of the monkeybone is hoped to attract 100% more tourists to our native region. And plans are already underway to make the Korowai village a top New Guinea resort within the next decade.
News of increased tourism has brought about debate over the Korowai's notable lack of clothing. Recent studies show that the lifelong nudity of our tribe can only increase outside interest (photos of Korowai women published in Indigenous Skin Magazine gave the tribe a much needed PR boost in 2003). A number of households, however, are demanding some middle ground. "We're not asking for anything as drastic as the Wawakib Tribe, feathers and skirts and whatnot... we'd simply like a light windbreaker or at least some short shorts. Winter nights can be a bit brisk."
Tribe members also point out the increase in productivity to be gained from shrouding. An independent study shows that the average Korowai hunter spends 93 minutes every day tiptoeing through a patch of forest nettles, while females complain about interference from certain body parts during their daily manual labor. "I could grind twice as much sago paste every day if my girls weren't always flapping around the pestle."
Another point of contention, your highness, is the act of cannibalism. While many Korowai believe that practicing Black Magic should be chastised, the devouring of fellow tribesmen is not the preferred form of punishment. 73% of the Korowai find the act of eating friends and colleagues to be revolting and barbaric, if not incredibly awkward. There are some dissidents, however, who believe in retaining this gastrological form of justice. "Cannibalism is not only a tradition of the tribe but it has familial relevance for me," states female tribe member, Paballo Madi. "Both my mother and father were eaten by their children. They were delicious; and I hope that one day the same can be said for me."
While appearance and justice make up the majority of Korowai concern, the tribe feels that traditional marriage practices do not fit their personal preference. This statement is derived from the staggering 90% percent of males who do not wish to marry within the tribe. One Korowai deserter, Kutube refused to comply with tribal marriage laws. On the phone from his Port Moresby condominium, Kutube (known as "Ron" to the locals) feels that he made the correct decision. "I can't tell you how great it is to meet a woman on the beach and not have to worry about whether or not she is your mother's mother's brother's daughter. For me, the dating pool has become an ocean. And I'm a cruise ship."
So you see, your honor, as presented by the Project for a New Korowai Century, we hope that within the next decade many if not all of the aforementioned practices can be altered to meet the opinion of the greater tribe. In order to function as a cohesive unit, we feel that we need some change and need to feel that we are functional part of modern world. Hopefully, you, as an all-knowing leader of the Zalatu bloodline, can understand the significance of these requests. If not, we'd at least like to have a t.v. and VCR so that we can watch the tape of ourselves on the Discovery Channel that "Ron" sent last month.
Hoping that he will not be slaughtered for his insolence,