It is pretty common, this attitude or aptitude (or masochistic desire even) for sticking with surely doomed relations. Most people have been in a relationship that starts out awesome but then just gets bogged down, and by then they're so deep into it, they can't see what's obvious to all of their friends. They need to end the relationship. They contort their emotions into poly-angular yoga poses for months before finally giving in to the inevitable. Even when their best friend sits them down for a cup of coffee and says, "Listen, no matter how hard you work, the oil is going to run out some day."

They roll their eyes. They huff. They start a dozen promises of moving on in the relationship, of being happy, of being in love, of being a hundred other things besides being afraid to leave something that's been a part of them for the biggest changes in their industrial and economic development. The best friend tries again.

"I know OPEC is artificially sustaining high prices and we are developing the technology to exploit deep ocean reserves and that there are a number of nations just beginning to develop their potential to produce oil, but those are just delaying tactics. They're just questions of 'when' not 'if?'

"I'm not blaming anybody for this. I'm just saying that there's an important difference between the finite and the infinite no matter how big the finite is."

Here the best friend will usually offer to pick up the tab for the coffee, because they know you're not going to take what they've been saying very well. Their nervousness starts to show here. They're starting to think this was a mistake that they should've waited a week, that they should've planned an intervention instead of a conversation. They're on your side and will show you with a latte if necessary. They continue.

"Don't get me wrong I don't think it was all bad, I mean, I can't imagine what you'd be like today without oil. But you can't settle with oil. Whether it's 10, 50, 100 or 1,000 years from now, oil is still going to leave you. It's a fact. Why not plan for it now?

"I mean, it's your relationship so it's up to you, but do you really want this to end in a dishes-throwing, total societal collapse, because that's where it's heading. Or, do you want to make this a smooth, supported transition? Remember, I'm with you all the way."

They shift awkwardly a little bit with their hands around the mug trying to figure out a way to make what their friend is saying somehow not true. Take a sip. Pretend they're thinking about getting a scone.

"I know there are a lot of people working to help you keep this relationship going. Why, just the other day I saw that President Bush is meeting with Saudi Arabia to try and lower the gas prices. And, they've discovered some more viable ways of extracting oil from bitumen. And, I saw they're going to be opening up ANWR for drilling, but I don't think they have your best interest in mind. Listen to me. I'm your friend. I've been close to you my whole life."

Here the friend throws a few anecdotes in about art entering consciousnesses together, and when they learned about electricity together and some of the crazy times they had in college and those times at Carnival in Rio.

The listener acts like they've got the name of the song playing the background right on the tip of their tongue and only need the chorus to come around once more for them to get it.

"And I know what you're going to say. You're going to say that you're working really hard to be less dependent on oil. You're going to tell to me to look at all those hybrid cars out there. And at those bio-diesel things you've heard about, that you're really thinking of getting into that. But you can't fool me." This is the spot where eye-contact gets hard. "I've seen all the hummers. I see where you set your temperature dial. And just look at all the plastic stuff in your house." The best friend stops with a little hand gesture and a sigh. "I just don't want to see an economic collapse that leads a fight for survival world war with the potential to become an absolute nuclear holocaust That's all. I care about you."

Anyone who's ever played the best friend role in these conversations knows how they usually go. The friend you're so desperate to help ends up denying the whole problem. The coffee gets cold as the discussion becomes an argument. The friend leaves more determined than ever to stick to their destructive habits in the romantic name of economic growth. The most frustrating thing is the problem is so obvious to you. People should stop driving gas guzzling cars. People should re-use grocery bags. People should do everything possible to break up with oil while there's still some in the ground.

So the friend leaves a tip. The friend looks around at the sky and the people on the sidewalk hoping that when the relationship finally explodes that they don't get hit by the shrapnel. The friend walks out two lattes poorer than when he walked in. Hopes the next bus comes soon.

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